Jack Smith
It was Thursday, the last day we met. In front of a bus, we parted. We didn’t say anything. We just kissed and drowned ourselves in it since it’d be our last.
Relax, nobody died in this story. Like I said, we only parted. Ugh! ‘Only’ is such a soft word, because ‘only’ will simplify everything, because the word will make our parting moment easier to bear, when the moment felt like the end of my love life. Now I know, it probably was.
Six month prior to that parting scene.
After screaming our head off at the barrack where we would be sleeping that night, my two exchange friends, Nina and Paula, and myself, headed to the big aula to meet other friends from all over Indiana. Since it was the mid-year conference, all exchange students from Indiana were supposed to come, so far, we’ve only known those who lived in upper Indiana (if that’s how people call it).
Then, there he was. Playing pool with Oli of Switzerland, with his leather jacket and his skinhead-cut that was hidden inside his hat. Cool, as he always is. Not noticing that three of the most loud and noisy girls just entered the room. I was so drawn to him. Maybe it was because he looked like this rebellious guy I could never have. I guess I wasn’t the only one who was quite drawn to him. Looked at Nina giggling!
Soon after that, I noticed that Jack was also drawn to Nina, but, oh!, he’s shy. So instead, he came and sat near me. We talked and talked and talked, until finally he revealed that he had this crush on my friend. Surprisingly, I was happy to hear that. Next thing I knew, these guys started flirting with each other.
But Jack was so shy that instead of sitting close to Nina, he sat next to me the whole time. Got punishment in the game of charade just to sit in the toilet with me. By the end of the 3-day conference, Jack and I were bestfriends! Plus, with my matchmaking skills, Nina and Jack got to kiss before we said goodbyes.
Just before I got in the car with my host parents, I told him to write me letters. But instead, he called me the same night we said goodbye just to say that he had a really a good time and suggested that we should call each other up instead of writing because he was so bad at writing.
‘Why do you think I call you every night?’
So began the endless phone conversations at night. At the end of the month, I was so ashamed of my phone bills that I just asked for the total.
The conversation would always start with me asking, ‘So do you meet new girls today?’. I didn’t know why I asked that question. Maybe I was hoping that he answered, well, I’m talking to that girl. Yeah, I wish. The answer never came up. After only talking on the phone for 2 months, we had a chance to meet again at one of those exchange students meeting. Yay!
It was never awkward with me and Jack. That day we met, he came up to me (who always showed up late) and gave me the biggest hug. Hhmm.. I loved it. And we were glued the whole day (and the whole weekend, I got to why later on). I teased him when I saw Nina and told him to get his second kiss. He only gave me a big smile and replied with ‘I am not sure my girlfriend would like to see that’. That statement almost made my eyes pop-out. Girlfriend? Who could it possibly be? I was just talking to him the other night and he didn’t say anything!
Well, I didn’t dare ask. At least not until we were alone in that beautiful wood area at the back of the house. I asked carefully, ‘So, you’re seeing someone huh? How come you never told me anything about this?’ And he smiled. And I kept pushing to get an answer from him. Then, we came into this large wood, after sitting down I quietly watched the scenery of the beautiful Spring in March. And I remember again to ask him. So, I kept on asking him, ‘Come on tell me Jack!’ or ‘Who is it Jack?’ or ‘Do I know her Jack?’ and I kept going on, until he struck me with ‘It’s You!’.
What? What did he say? Did this rebellious kinda guy whom I thought I could never have just said that his girlfriend is ME? So, I gave him a look. A look that was a combination between ‘you are just messing with me’ and a deep hope, oh, please let it be true. And he simply said,’Why do you think I call you every night silly girl?’ And he hugged me and kissed my forehead. I hugged him back and felt like I never wanted to let him go.
That day will always be in my head. The scene is played so often in my head that if it is a DVD it’ll be broken already. That weekend, we were literally glued to each other! I didn’t say much, I didn’t know why because before, I could never shut my mouth.
Well, the rest is history.
Endless biweekly visit to Southern Indiana.
Endless cuddling.
Endless Kiss.
Endless hysterical laugh.
Endless Tom Petty.
Ooooh.. Endless Tom Petty.
Endless quiet moments when all we could hear was our own breath.
And of course, Endless Love.
Well, not endless probably, because it were, we would never be in front of a bus saying goodbyes in July.
Not up for anything!
A night before the separation, Jack wanted to spend the night partying and dancing, but I was just not up for it. Not up for it!, because in a few hours both of us will be separated forever, in a few hours I won’t ever feel the way his hand hold mine, in a few hours I won’t ever feel the way his hand caresses my back every time we kiss, in a few hours I have to say goodbye to him.
Jack and I have discussed this before actually. This relationship should end in July when we parted in New York, because what’s the point of having long distance relationship when we knew that this relationship won’t be going anywhere. He’s in France. I’m in Jakarta. He’s a Christian. I’m a Moslem. He’s a Christian. I’m a Moslem. He’s a Christian. I’m a Moslem. We won’t be going anywhere with that.
Typical of Jack, he said, it’s up to you! If you wanted this relationship, we could give it a try. If you wanted this relationship, you wrote me. Me. So, the ball was in my court. I had to make decision.
That night when I was just not up for anything, I made my decision. I wouldn’t be writing him. I would be saying goodbye to him. So that night when he asked me to dance with him in the NYU dorms, I said no. I said I was tired. I said I needed some sleep for the long flights. I simply said ‘Please make sure you get up in the morning to see me leave’.
Sigh.
Thursday Morning
Last day in the land of the free.
End of my journey as an exchange student.
In a day, I would be meeting my family that I hadn’t seen in almost a year now.
But, I didn’t think about that. All I could think of was saying goodbye to Jack. I felt like I could never be over him after this. Suddenly, I was thinking, what if he didn’t come and meet me here, what if he was so drunk from that party last night. Well, that’s just nice I thought sadly, because I won’t be saying goodbye to him at all.
I opened my dorm room and then, there he was. Sleeping in front of my room. I woke him up and he gave me what seemingly the nicest smile someone ever gave me and said ‘I slept here, because I was afraid if I went back to my room, I overslept and you won’t wake me up. And I couldn’t see you leave.’
Oh, Heaven!
So, he watched me leave.
That morning, I still got to feel his hand inside mine.
For the last time…
I looked at him closely because I wanted to remember his face.
I hugged him tightly because I wanted to remember his smell.
I held his hand so closely to let him know that I have loved him.
From the window, I saw him pointing at him and mouthing ‘You. Write me First!’ I just nodded.
I never wrote him.
Today. 10 years after the morning.
He found me.
Or I found him.
Doesn’t matter.
We found each other.
Oh.. Heaven!
Relax, nobody died in this story. Like I said, we only parted. Ugh! ‘Only’ is such a soft word, because ‘only’ will simplify everything, because the word will make our parting moment easier to bear, when the moment felt like the end of my love life. Now I know, it probably was.
Six month prior to that parting scene.
After screaming our head off at the barrack where we would be sleeping that night, my two exchange friends, Nina and Paula, and myself, headed to the big aula to meet other friends from all over Indiana. Since it was the mid-year conference, all exchange students from Indiana were supposed to come, so far, we’ve only known those who lived in upper Indiana (if that’s how people call it).
Then, there he was. Playing pool with Oli of Switzerland, with his leather jacket and his skinhead-cut that was hidden inside his hat. Cool, as he always is. Not noticing that three of the most loud and noisy girls just entered the room. I was so drawn to him. Maybe it was because he looked like this rebellious guy I could never have. I guess I wasn’t the only one who was quite drawn to him. Looked at Nina giggling!
Soon after that, I noticed that Jack was also drawn to Nina, but, oh!, he’s shy. So instead, he came and sat near me. We talked and talked and talked, until finally he revealed that he had this crush on my friend. Surprisingly, I was happy to hear that. Next thing I knew, these guys started flirting with each other.
But Jack was so shy that instead of sitting close to Nina, he sat next to me the whole time. Got punishment in the game of charade just to sit in the toilet with me. By the end of the 3-day conference, Jack and I were bestfriends! Plus, with my matchmaking skills, Nina and Jack got to kiss before we said goodbyes.
Just before I got in the car with my host parents, I told him to write me letters. But instead, he called me the same night we said goodbye just to say that he had a really a good time and suggested that we should call each other up instead of writing because he was so bad at writing.
‘Why do you think I call you every night?’
So began the endless phone conversations at night. At the end of the month, I was so ashamed of my phone bills that I just asked for the total.
The conversation would always start with me asking, ‘So do you meet new girls today?’. I didn’t know why I asked that question. Maybe I was hoping that he answered, well, I’m talking to that girl. Yeah, I wish. The answer never came up. After only talking on the phone for 2 months, we had a chance to meet again at one of those exchange students meeting. Yay!
It was never awkward with me and Jack. That day we met, he came up to me (who always showed up late) and gave me the biggest hug. Hhmm.. I loved it. And we were glued the whole day (and the whole weekend, I got to why later on). I teased him when I saw Nina and told him to get his second kiss. He only gave me a big smile and replied with ‘I am not sure my girlfriend would like to see that’. That statement almost made my eyes pop-out. Girlfriend? Who could it possibly be? I was just talking to him the other night and he didn’t say anything!
Well, I didn’t dare ask. At least not until we were alone in that beautiful wood area at the back of the house. I asked carefully, ‘So, you’re seeing someone huh? How come you never told me anything about this?’ And he smiled. And I kept pushing to get an answer from him. Then, we came into this large wood, after sitting down I quietly watched the scenery of the beautiful Spring in March. And I remember again to ask him. So, I kept on asking him, ‘Come on tell me Jack!’ or ‘Who is it Jack?’ or ‘Do I know her Jack?’ and I kept going on, until he struck me with ‘It’s You!’.
What? What did he say? Did this rebellious kinda guy whom I thought I could never have just said that his girlfriend is ME? So, I gave him a look. A look that was a combination between ‘you are just messing with me’ and a deep hope, oh, please let it be true. And he simply said,’Why do you think I call you every night silly girl?’ And he hugged me and kissed my forehead. I hugged him back and felt like I never wanted to let him go.
That day will always be in my head. The scene is played so often in my head that if it is a DVD it’ll be broken already. That weekend, we were literally glued to each other! I didn’t say much, I didn’t know why because before, I could never shut my mouth.
Well, the rest is history.
Endless biweekly visit to Southern Indiana.
Endless cuddling.
Endless Kiss.
Endless hysterical laugh.
Endless Tom Petty.
Ooooh.. Endless Tom Petty.
Endless quiet moments when all we could hear was our own breath.
And of course, Endless Love.
Well, not endless probably, because it were, we would never be in front of a bus saying goodbyes in July.
Not up for anything!
A night before the separation, Jack wanted to spend the night partying and dancing, but I was just not up for it. Not up for it!, because in a few hours both of us will be separated forever, in a few hours I won’t ever feel the way his hand hold mine, in a few hours I won’t ever feel the way his hand caresses my back every time we kiss, in a few hours I have to say goodbye to him.
Jack and I have discussed this before actually. This relationship should end in July when we parted in New York, because what’s the point of having long distance relationship when we knew that this relationship won’t be going anywhere. He’s in France. I’m in Jakarta. He’s a Christian. I’m a Moslem. He’s a Christian. I’m a Moslem. He’s a Christian. I’m a Moslem. We won’t be going anywhere with that.
Typical of Jack, he said, it’s up to you! If you wanted this relationship, we could give it a try. If you wanted this relationship, you wrote me. Me. So, the ball was in my court. I had to make decision.
That night when I was just not up for anything, I made my decision. I wouldn’t be writing him. I would be saying goodbye to him. So that night when he asked me to dance with him in the NYU dorms, I said no. I said I was tired. I said I needed some sleep for the long flights. I simply said ‘Please make sure you get up in the morning to see me leave’.
Sigh.
Thursday Morning
Last day in the land of the free.
End of my journey as an exchange student.
In a day, I would be meeting my family that I hadn’t seen in almost a year now.
But, I didn’t think about that. All I could think of was saying goodbye to Jack. I felt like I could never be over him after this. Suddenly, I was thinking, what if he didn’t come and meet me here, what if he was so drunk from that party last night. Well, that’s just nice I thought sadly, because I won’t be saying goodbye to him at all.
I opened my dorm room and then, there he was. Sleeping in front of my room. I woke him up and he gave me what seemingly the nicest smile someone ever gave me and said ‘I slept here, because I was afraid if I went back to my room, I overslept and you won’t wake me up. And I couldn’t see you leave.’
Oh, Heaven!
So, he watched me leave.
That morning, I still got to feel his hand inside mine.
For the last time…
I looked at him closely because I wanted to remember his face.
I hugged him tightly because I wanted to remember his smell.
I held his hand so closely to let him know that I have loved him.
From the window, I saw him pointing at him and mouthing ‘You. Write me First!’ I just nodded.
I never wrote him.
Today. 10 years after the morning.
He found me.
Or I found him.
Doesn’t matter.
We found each other.
Oh.. Heaven!
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