back!

i'm back to being this selfish self again, which i totally don't mind, in fact i kinda miss her.

i'm glad that i care less about things that i highly thought about these few months. i don't know how, but suddenly, it just feels like it's not worth it anymore to worry much. to agonize over stupid stuffs like getting hurt.

i just got that person back. the person who guards herself well, that she wouldn't let anyone hurt her. you know, the pride one.

i'm back to being her.

i refused to be the person that i have been for the past months.
i refused to beg.
i refused to feel like i'm gonna get hurt one of these days.
i refused to care much.

i just thought that, whatever happens, happens. whatever will be, will be. because at the end of the day, even if i'm alone, i still have Allah SWT to keep me strong.

i don't care anymore.

and surprisingly, the feelings make situation better these days.

pa, do you notice the difference?

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